Never To Become

My eyes locked themselves onto his form immediately, watching him with the sort of intent a wild cat would use to stalk their prey. Steady and unblinking. A few clouds loomed over the faintly glowing sliver of moon that hung in the sky above me, making the night a fair deal darker than usual. No matter. Mako did wonders for enhancing one’s vision. I could see him just as well as I would on the brightest of summer days.

He wasn’t doing very much tonight from what I could see from my perch on one of the fire-escapes across from his apartment. This little spot provided an excellent view of him, while all the while cloaking me in darkness. He had no idea I was here. That was probably a good thing. Someone like me wasn’t exactly what one would call good company, especially to a Turk.

I remembered seeing him for the first time only a short time ago. I had ventured over to meet with that pathetic wheelchair-bound President Shinra at Healin Lodge to discuss the whereabouts of my dear Mother. The President wasn’t there alone. Then again, he would be a fool if he had been. Two of his minions were there with him, ready to obey any command from their precious master like the dogs they were.

And he was one of them.

I never really paid him any heed on that day. He was merely an obstacle in the way of my prime objective. It was a poorly thought-out fight, and I had him and his partner in a painful heap on the floor in a matter of seconds.

What really caught my attention about him were his eyes. They were a penetrating powder blue colour that seemed to drive into your very soul. I recalled the way they looked up at me from his spot on the floor of the lodge, so full of spite and loathing towards me. He wanted to rip my throat out. Even as I stood there above him, with the will and strength to end his life at any given moment, he was not afraid of me. I found it highly attractive.

After that day, I found myself going out of my way to follow this man. Why? I could not say. He intrigued me the way he carried himself with a laid back attitude that presented the sort of arrogance most people tried to avoid. I was drawn to it like a moth to a flame. I needed to know more about him.

It wasn’t long before I knew his name and where he lived. My hearing was impeccable what with the Mako coursing through my veins. All it took was the right hiding spot, and I could pick up on his conversations without him being the wiser. He wasn’t what most people would call a discreet man, anyways. Loud and obnoxious without a care in the world. Practically everyone on the street could hear him when he walked by with his partner.

Reno Sinclair. That name suited him. Cool and smooth with that hint of danger that always seemed to draw me in. It rolled off my tongue with such ease, it was though I was meant to speak it.

Tonight was a slow night. My brothers and I weren’t any closer to finding Mother than we had been a few days ago. That angered be greatly, but I was not about to let such emotions get in the way of my mission. I needed to find Mother and go forth with the Reunion. No matter what it took, the deed was to be done. To help ease my frazzled mind, I decided to spend a few hours observing my favourite human subject. That always seemed to cheer me up. Reno was a free spirit with the personality of a firecracker, hot and unpredictable. I almost envied him. I never knew such feelings of pure bliss and freedom. My life had always been based around one thing: finding Mother. I never knew the taste of the rebelliousness that seemed to melt off of Reno like chocolate under a sunbeam.

I wondered if he would ever show me.

It was a long shot to ever think of such a thing but, upon observing the redhead from my spot on the fire-escape of a neighbouring building, the thought just couldn’t escape my mind. Could someone like him ever even associate himself with someone...something…like me? A Remnant of the infamous one-winged angel all of Gaia knew and feared? How could he? We were meant to be enemies. It was written in the stars. My mission was to go forth with the Reunion, and his mission was to try and stop me. That was the way it worked.

But, I never really was one to follow the rules.

And I could tell from all my observations of Reno that neither was he.

The night was growing late, and still I did not move from my perch. I had a brilliant view in through one of the windows of Reno’s apartment. He was in the kitchen, busying himself with making a pot of coffee. His long wild mane of fiery hair wasn’t tied back into its usual ponytail, but let loose to freely hang down his lean back. He had replaced his usual Turk’s uniform with a simple pair of loose pyjama bottoms and a red t-shirt. It looked like he was staying in tonight. What luck.

As I watched him, I couldn’t keep my eyes off of every simple move he made. Every step across the floor, every sway of those hips, every casual glance up at the television screen blaring in the other room, I watched. It wasn’t as though the man was doing back flips or something else entertaining but, for some reason, my eyes were glued to him. He was, dare I say it, beautiful. And it shocked me that I would ever think that of a human, especially one that was working for ShinRa. But it was true. Reno was utterly stunning.

The coffee was ready, and I watched intently as the redhead poured himself a streaming mug. He didn’t add anything to the drink other than a bit of sugar before he brought the rim to his lips to take a sip. I eyed those lips closely. Even from my spot, my Mako vision allowed me to see the moisture that lingered on them from sipping the coffee. I shivered, wondering how those lips would feel against my own. Brushing and kissing the skin all over my body, making every last ounce of anger and frustration that wracked my being simply float away.

I blinked and shook my head, trying to banish such thoughts from my mind. Dear Mother, what was wrong with me? How could I succumb to such weakness? I have never before in my life felt something like this. It was frightening that someone like me could want something this badly. I’ve only known myself to wanting Mother, but now…

I wanted Reno.

A sudden noise from Reno’s apartment drew my cat-slit eyes back. It sounded like knocking. Reno must have heard it also, for he had put his coffee down on the counter and started heading towards the front door. Funny, I hadn’t noticed anyone approach the apartment. Probably because my attention was focused on something else. I made a mental note on not getting distracted so easily in the future. Such weaknesses would be frowned upon by Mother.

Reno had disappeared from my line of vision for a few moments, before returning back accompanied by none other than his partner from ShinRa. That didn’t surprise me. They spent all their time together at work, why shouldn’t they during their off time? What was his name again? I had heard Reno say it many times before. Rude? That was probably it.

Rude kicked off his shoes and shrugged off the simple jacket he wore. It looked as though he was planning to stay for a while. I leaned in a bit to catch what they were saying to each other, the leather on my body creaking with every movement. It wasn’t that interesting. Ramblings about missions and what not. Utterly dull. Reno was smiling about it though, and I couldn’t resist smiling as well. His smile was contagious and incredibly brilliant.

When Reno turned to prepare a second cup of coffee for his partner, I was startled to witness Rude come up behind and wrap his huge strong arms around the redhead’s lean body. I frowned, half-expecting Reno to spin around and hit him for such inappropriate contact. Instead, Reno’s smile widened and he leaned back against his partner to give him an affectionate snuggle. I could feel my heart begin to race inside my chest, and my stomach was making this horrible churning sensation that made me want to throw up. What was going on?

Rude leaned in and whispered something to Reno that my Mako-enhanced hearing didn’t pick up. Damn! Well, whatever he said, it caused something to flash through his partner’s blue eyes. Something hazy and wonderful. I watched with baited breath as the redhead spun around in his partner’s arms and crushed their lips together in a hot passionate kiss. My heart stopped.

So that’s what was going on. They weren’t only partners.

They were lovers.

My chest tightened with every second that passed while I watched them kiss. Reno’s arms were wrapped tightly around his partner’s strong neck, pulling him down against him in a desperate need to have him close. Rude had one hand tangled through those long beautiful red locks and he pushed Reno back against the counter, making the redhead moan loud enough for me to hear. I winced at that sound. My eyes were locked on Rude as he laid himself over Reno’s body and kissed him, tasted him, claimed him as his and his alone.

To my immediate shock and worry, I suddenly felt the faint sting of tears in my eyes. It wasn’t often that I cried, and it frightened me that they had been triggered so easily. I wiped them away angrily, hating how weak I had become. Hating how I had let my emotions get in the way of everything else that was important in my life. I had been a fool. An absolute fool. I had let my mind wander from my mission just because of one stupid beautiful man.

I shouldn’t have been surprised, though. It wasn’t as though I would have expected Reno to see me as nothing more than the enemy. He was a Turk.; a loyal minion to those bastards that had hidden my Mother from me. I was a Remnant of Sephiroth. A puppet, a pawn, a tiny fragment of something far greater. I would be nothing to him but a target for one of his bullets. And he would be exactly what he started off to be: an obstacle getting in the way of my true objective. Just something else for my sword to slash down.

That was our fate, and I welcomed it with open arms.